There comes a point over the course of any commitment when you just don’t want to do that thing you promised to do no matter what. I reached that point last month, only three months into our One Awesome Date Every Month promise
It was a Saturday. I had been sitting in the car most of the day, driving past prospective houses with my parents. Not exactly taxing stuff, I can admit, but when we arrived back at my house I was grumpy, hungry and in need of a shower. Or, as my husband sarcastically put it, “prime date material.”
The pissy voice in my head took this opportunity to start making excuses.
“The date’s not going to be much fun if I’m feeling like this."
“We probably shouldn’t bother.”
“If I force this thing, I’ll end up resenting the whole process.”
“We’ve got five more nights before Ryan leaves to go on tour. That’s plenty of time to reschedule.”
That last thought was the one that tipped me off. It was such an obvious lie that I had to instantly discredit all other notions offered up by this unreliable voice. Since when is rescheduling a date an easy thing? What kind of person gives up free childcare and assumes that booking a sitter in the next few days is a foregone conclusion?
So I changed my clothes (an action that approximates showering in a pinch), slightly altered the “visibly annoyed” look on my face and got in the car.
What happened next should surprise no one: I had fun.
It started with a series of jokes between Ryan and me about the dearth of tasty dining options on the way from Williston to Essex. Call it a case of misery enjoying company, but if I’m going to be playing the role of Little Miss Grumpy, who better to pair me with than Mr. Food Snob? We laughed our way through a mediocre dinner, far less concerned with the sad, little sprinkling of cheese on our nachos than with the fact that neither of us had ever been to this particular restaurant before and who were these people eating here?!? Quite simply, we were enjoying ourselves — and each other. And I was no longer grumpy, tired or wishing I could have just gone to bed.
My adventurous husband always says that when you’re on the fence, 100 times out of 100, the answer is “Yes!” Go. Do. Date night is no exception. Push past that resistance-bred ring of fire!
It would be ludicrous to assume that you’re going to be pumped every time date night rolls around. So make a promise to yourself to veto excuses and bad attitudes outright. Your date, your relationship — and maybe even your life! — will be better for it.
Read more about Angela and Ryan's date in a special Valentine’s Day-inspired dating feature in the February issue of